Wednesday, August 30, 2006
oh heavenly! psy mid term is going to be MCQs..thats like so wow man. anyway think im down with flu! shits. the feeling is just terrible, why cant the germs decide to just attack any other people than me?
anyway things are really slowing down like slow slow slow, i mean there are changes here and there, good and bad, and im acting as if i didnt care, pretending to embrace it, but seriously, i hate the fact things are changing. relationships with different people are taking a bit of a turn, of course compelled by various social factors which i obviously cant give a damn shit change about, well im bascially still searching for the 'right' way. and i wonder why, the more i search, the more things go haywire, and the more things get more complicated. and the harder i try, things just seem to go all the wrong way.this is oh so terrible! i mean i cant even give a damn shit reason of why im doing psy when my tutor asked me just now, what d hell am i doing man?
bottomline, i just know it. i just know im supposed to do psy, obviously i cant tell my tutor that.
maybe im trying to hard, or maybe my brain and heart just decided one day that they should like go separate ways or something, they are so not working together! cant they learn teamwork? and not try to manipulate me in their own freaking ways, im getting confused of what they want! oh whatever.
i hate the way you affect me that nobody else does. shit, you are back again.
11:44 PM muacksbisous :) Y
Thursday, August 24, 2006
If you ever stopped to look around, like I did, you would agree with me that most people who had rough lives, or have dozens of siblings, or had lived literally in a “war-zoned-country” are people who eventually became successful in their lives. Not really because they are like desperate to get a better life, But rather of them knowing what they want and how badly they want it that really made the difference.
They dared, they dared to dream high.
Sometimes, I secretly wished I had their courage to dream really big, but at the end of the day, that mysterious force never fails to convince me that I really do not deserve it. Part of me wanted to like ignore it, but the rest of me were seriously conscious of the reality. -Pessimistically- my world turns grey. Like old time enemies, actions from the past crept up to me, words I said rang in my ears loudly, selfish thoughts I had reminded me of my evil half, and things I failed to do made me regret. Little bits and pieces of me and my past reminded me, that I do not deserve my dreams. And yet again, ironically, I never stopped dreaming.
At this point of life, I wished I had no worldly worries or emotions so that I can charged forward and embrace my dreams, sadly, thats not the case. I wished I could know that I am making the right decisions, and I wished to be equipped with all the knowledge I need to win my dreams, because i know I need to win my life before it wins me. I really hate this, I hate having to fight hard to know that im still alive. If I could ever stop and wait for everything to fall in place, just wait, and wait, then I would never have to worry. Sadly, I cant wait, because only the lucky ones and the losers wait, wait for their dreams to find them. Dont tell me to take it easy because its never easy, and dont tell me to not worry because I will never stop worrying. Yes, I can stop dwelling on this part of life and sleep through the night, thinking everything is perfect, but one day, just that one day, I would still have to return to this. And right now, all it takes is a step forward, a chance but I wished I knew how. Sadly, I dont.
Friends, I hope you do.
And maybe, just maybe one day, I could say -Im having a g-r-e-a-t life!-
Cause thats what we all are working towards, isnt it?
12:15 AM muacksbisous :) Y
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
i cant bloOo-dy believe my psy prof act finished the whole entire chapter on nervous system and brain in like 1.45 hours, ignoring the fact we actually do have like 10 minutes break in btw. as a matter of fact, not only did he not like explain, i figured i learnt nothing from his lecture, i really pity those arts students who did nt act. take bio before, oh wells. sucks.
anyway, its amazing how i got all my tutorial slots sucessfully while my friends are like cursing the freaking balloting system, its first time i got lucky, think i really should buy some lottery or what. cheers to me!
last note, i rejected french lessons! french! nvm, next sem.
anyway, happy birthday to my best pri sch fren and nana~! though its belated. oOps.
3:46 PM muacksbisous :) Y
Saturday, August 19, 2006
bloogging is becoming kinda like a more n more tedious stuff, not that theres lack of things to share with u guys, but rather, i forgot about all about my thoughts once i actually tried to post a post. well, that feeling of sharing something is no longer there. maybe, things will get better when i actually do get a laptop, so i can blog whenever i want, instead of facing some retarded slow com everyday. (arg)
uni finally kick started, and boy do i feel exhausted already. its amazing sitting in nus mac one day and realise - hey-im-a-uni-student-eating-mac-breakfast-on-a-normal-day. well, viv can relate to that right? n planning timetable is such a chore, but not getting d ideal one sucks totally even more. but at least d lectures are keepin my positive outlook of uni life so far, except maybe chi lect - which is totally out of point.
anyway, i finally found somebody who thinks the same way as me, who act do have a PHD degree, like wowables. things like whether cow from india and cow from switz speak the same language, or whether cockroaches attend schools and learn about humans and stuff, i mean my prof actually thought about it too, like its-so-amazing-mans. ha.
one more thing, my father is actually working on a project of a club at labarador park, and guess what? some designer designed a swimming pool which have like a gym right in the middle of it! im so excited to see how it turns out and whether ppl do act. run in the gym while ppl swimming down there looks at her/him. wowables.
10:47 PM muacksbisous :) Y
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
stats lecture on monday was oh-wow-its-just-common-sense, half the time i was day dreaming, n half the time i was thinking if i should just drop this module, in d end, i just decided not to, not if french offers me a place though (
heh!).
anyway, the 1st psy lecture i went for today was unexpectedly surprising and fun!
on top of the usual dead content that the lecturer is obliged to deliver to us students, the lecturer himself is one whole interesting chapter.
serious.hes bald but not fat,hes a man but had metro characteristics, whatever it is, the way he talks is really fascinating and humourous, half the time i was just laughing and grinning at him.
serious.well, this lecture was supposed to be about history and origins of psy, and bald-but-not-fat showed us some ancestors whom he happily referred to as
unattractive dead white men.
serious.not only that, bald-not-fat introduced us to d concept of visual illusion which i find it rather wowable.
serious. 
just stare at this one.
honestly, they are not moving. and they will not if u just stare at them long enough.
how cool is that! now you MUST visit dis 2 webby, i swear u will start thinking u r nuts.
serious.
http://www.michaelbach.de/ot/mot_mib/index.htmlhttp://www.patmedia.net/marklevinson/cool/cool_illusion.htmlnow thats what i called
psychology. kudos to our brain!
serious.
4:43 PM muacksbisous :) Y
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Wrestling is such a cruel sport!
ignoring the fact that most of d results are like fixed beforehand, and hence no point watching it.....but its simply just too
cruel! How can anyone watch 2 people or 4 people fight fight fight like theres no tml..and know that the results are fixed? i mean whats the point? do we simply enjoy violencE?
Not to mention all those
REAL matches, you know, cage matches, prison matches, oh whatever, i dun even if they r
REAL.. but it certainly does look like it since theres no rules, no refrees, and anyone can get killed legally in these matches. well, my father seems to be enjoying a hell lot of it, n i seriously wonder how much violence potential is hiding in him waiting to be unleashed, i mean its life and death! was watching this UNDERTAKER fighting a prison match with BIG SHOW, and it was like
gory bloody and scary. i really dont care what kind of agreement they signed beforehand that makes killing each other actually legal, be it banging each other against the hard fences? or throwing each other into tables, or even strangling each other with ropes.. whatever it is, its too cruel man. how can anyone make killing legal? even commiting suicide is like illegal in singapore and the dead body has to be whipped, but i guess its just singapore huh? America is free and since the audience enjoy watching ppl killing each other, who cares right?
and the wrestlers themselves, willing to be killed legally? thats shit man. what the hell r they thinking?
i seriously wonder..
11:42 PM muacksbisous :) Y
Friday, August 04, 2006
ooh-lalasIm weak and tired but arts orientation was super duper fun (Nana-na-na-NA). though exhausted by the runs and games, cheers and gossiping kept me going like mad. Arts people are super super nice man.. never thought I would actually like orientation (oh wow!) n its only the 1st day!
im really kinda glad im in arts and gonna pursue my likes, this is like oh-so-cool~ met quite some friends but somehow felt that I will never have the same kind of friendship I had back in sec school and AC, im so looking forward for the lectures and tutorials though im like alone, but I guess its just another kind of life right. Im so so sO
SO looking forward to it, at least for the moment.
Cheers to
great fac!
great seniors!
great camp!
Great frens!
And a G-r-e-a-t new life!
Hip Hip Hooray!
11:35 PM muacksbisous :) Y
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
SMRT is jacking up the transport fees again!
o m g... that means more money is going to go to bringing myself around singapore in the near future then (aye!). alright, although they are in the process of applying for the price increase now for the reason of increased expenses, im pretty sure it will be approved, i mean when is it that such requests are rejected? even the most difficult one to be approved has already been approved and we are going to get a casino whether you like it or not, why cant it be a disneyland or something, (oh what the hell). anyway its really quite redundant to inform us citizens that whoever whoever is applying for whatever whatever, its just a tactic to get us citizens to get used to the idea and accept it before they implement it, so we wun use it as an excuse to not vote for them the next time round. n also because the fact is - they are goin to implement it regardless of what. and if we have the slightest rejection of an idea or policy that they are going to implement, all the precautions and measures starts being thrown to us, like how they will have rules to limit the amount to be gambled per singaporean or what gambling help-line. its just like they have the whole proposal done and signed just waiting for us to read and understand it.
so, really theres no need to tell us that SMRT have already filed an application with the government, because we all know they will approve it some way or another,and this will go on forever. how i wished i could do the same thing and file an application for an increase in my paycheck or something, with the reason being to support the ever rising transport fees, or high living expenses. (haha)
12:46 AM muacksbisous :) Y
